bored...

So ever since i don't have school anymore i have found myself to be quite BORED. After the spring semester was over i moved to this town (Perth Amboy) and i have greatly missed my friends back in hudson county. It seems like there are no places to go and meet ppl my age and with my interests. My brother is in HS and every week i find a group of 14-16 yr old boys in my house with whom i don't have much in common, besides them i havent meet anyone else in this place.

I am desperate to meet some other HUMAN BEING in order to put an end to this boredom, especially since i only have a week and a half left of my summer vacation. I am glad that my summer classes are over, but it would be nice to hang out with new friends before i have to start all over again in the fall semester!

people

shit!
It's funny how sometimes it takes one a long time to realize that you dislike a certain individual. Yesterday, with an over worked brained due to the never ending summer classes i had to take and combined with a few hits from our favorite friend MJ, I found myself in an argument with a certain individual. The discussion arose from the MJ itself, since i was the one that put in the most money, therefore entitleting me to its rightful ownership, i did not want to roll again. However, this person wanted to finish it and i brought up the money issue, to which she protested arguin that many times she has payed for everyone and not asked for anythin. However, i have been one that has been constantly excluded and rarely been offered anythin.

Anyhow, after seen his/her reaction (even in my half conscious state), i realized how much we have grown apart from our startin friendship to now. I can no longer recognize how this individual feels or even worst, wats goin on in his/her head. Many changes have occured which have driven us down completely separate paths causing yesterday's evident clash. So much so, that i have discovered a newfound dislike for this individual.

It is interesting to see how one changes with time and due to the circumstances that are faced daily. I for one have become a come confident and independent person, however the rest of my acquaintances seem to be walkin down a road of uncertainty.

Nobody’s Children

Toss them

Trade them
Train them
Leave them

From left to right they’ll go about
Treated like mindless dolls
Manipulated by the grown
Tossed into the abyss of the unknown

Up and down they’ll travel the streets
Looking for a warm home to rest
A caring family to possess
And love that will never end

Around and around they will be tossed
Like a carousel at top speed
By the ones that claim their genes

Love is unknown to them
Home is a figment of their imagination
Care is neglected
Food
Is
Denied

Nobody’s Children

Can you hear they’re screams?
On a cold wintry night

Can you see their faces?
Pressed between the floor and a moth eaten sheet
Beneath the dirt of the day

Can you imagine their dreams?
Of going to the moon
Becoming a princess
Or just being a doctor

Can you feel their despair?
When all is denied except air


Nobody’s Children
They are there

Can you alleviate their anguish?

HAY PERO QUE CALOR!

ITS HOT OUT THERE!

Desafortunadamente hoy tuve que caminar unas 5-6 cuadras y si no fuera por el agua que tenia en mi Nalgene bottle ahora mismo alguien estuviera escribiendo un obituary. No recuerdo la ultima vez en la cual habia sudado tanto en tan poco tiempo. La temperatura supuestamente llego a eso de los 110 GRADOS FARENHEIT!

Con ese calor uno puede consinar un bistec encima de un carro sin ningun problema. Pero que calor! Eso que naci en DR pero yo para temperaturas que pasan mas de 85 grados ya necesito un aire acondicionado porque el sudor y yo no combinamos.

Supongo que Al Gore debe de estar en su casa pensando, YO SE LOS DIGE, SENORES EL MUNDO SE ESTA CALENTANDO Y TODOS NO VAMOS A JODERRRRR!

Aunque yo creo que el ya tiene su pasaje reservado para irse a vivir al lado oscuro de la luna. Supuestamente la temperatura ahi es de -250 grados Farenheit. Asi que el va a estar vendiendo EQUIMALITO or como lo llaman ahora SKIM ICE para ver si se alivia esta ola de calor.

Bueno, yo mejor prendo mi Aire!

mi escuelita...

so...

July is almost over and I'm still in school (Summer Session at Rutgers University), down to my last of three classes that I forcefully put myself into. But what can I say? I love to learn, yet hate school. Something that I have recently admitted to myself. At times it feels like I'm just in school to get away from home *Major Truth* and at others it feels as if I'm just there to waste time *Another Major Truth* but what can I do? I'm a nineteen yr old who has no FUCKIN CLUE of where I want to be. But I'm not the only one, most of my friends are in the same exact boat of indecisiveness and every semester a letter arrives in each of our mailboxes, just to remind us of how much this state of bein costs down to a penny.

Estado Jardin

Hace ya casi ocho años que me encuentro radicada en el "Estado Jardin" pero pocos arboles he visto a mi alrededor, no mas edificios y el constante humo que emanan los carros y las fabricas. El sueño americano por fin realizado! Un sueño que consiste en cuatro paredes que con cada año que pasa te van encerrando entre un mundo tan surrealista que Salvador Dali le queda chico. La lluvia acida que no cesa y el invierno eterno que nunca desvanece, son los inevitables amigos de mis ventanas, que no hacen mas que enzeñar a mis ojos caidos el pronostico diario. Bufanda o paraguas? Quien sabra, en estos dias hay que salir preparado para la guerra no va y agarre uno el tan anticipado flu.

Tan hermoso que es mi "Estado Jardi," con sus tristes flores implorando a gritos el agua necesaria para colmar su sed. Esperando en cada dia que pasa un rayo de claridad y el fin del deficit estatal. Y que su fama no sea por causa de una serie televisiva de mafiosos italianos. Rodeado de mares impestados por la contaminancion y con arenas tan oscuras que el mismo cemento a veces es mas claro que los granitos cual rodean el mar. Tan bella su gente, compuesta por miles de etnicidades que sobreviven peleando por su individualidad, solo para ser aplastadas por la incomprension.

Estas son las bellezas de mi tierra adoptiva, que nada le tiene que envidiar a la natal. Ambas llenas de corruptos y esperando por un poder grandioso que les resuelva los mil y un enrredos en los cuales se encuentran estancados. Ambos vagabundos pidiendo limosna en la peor esquina del vecindario. Tan cerca del poder y asi tan lejos de alcanzarlo.

Que viva los estados estancados!

Endless

One of the central philosofies in Buddhism states that all things are connected through some way or another and the picture on the left is of the endless knot which symbolizes this relationship.